Are We Losing Manners? | Valentina Cirasola | Interior Designer

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The rules of Conduct, or Etiquette of everyday life have always distinguished the humans from the animals. The rules of conduct have had a great value in the evolution of man, an intelligent way to regulate his own life and the life of others.

However, the revolution of the ‘60s brought into society a refusal of conventions and restrictions, resulting in a new thinking and new set of non-rules. The proper manners of the Victorian Era considered as being too fussy, too constricted and not very expressive of human freedom, were thrown out the window completely, giving way to casual behavior, casual language, casual dressing and casual eating.

(Photo: The Oyster Lunch. Painting by: Jean-François de Troy – 1734)

Most people consider Etiquette a set of behavioral rules, but in reality Etiquette is a value system that helps us understand how not to offend others while harmonizing our own daily life.

Good manners and good customs are not the same thing and therefore it is not easy to distinguish one from the other. Good manners become in time the customs of the society’s next generation. The generation of the ‘60s not only rejected Etiquette and the value of good manners, but also refused to teach them to the generation they created. It just so happened that in the course of 50 some years we have become accustomed to see bad manners and often we feel numb around people displaying bad manners.

(Photo: Elegant Marrymaking. Painting by: Peter Angellis. Date unknown).

Having good manners is not for “dandies”, it symbolizes self-control and reliability, but it also translates in owing one’s emotions. Having good manners makes a good impression in business, on people with hiring power, on new friends and allow us to open doors. It has been said: “kindness will give us friends”.
Who on earth wants to be around disrespectful and badly mannered people?

In the last few years, etiquette schools and forums are now springing up like mushrooms, as society wants to evolve and return to the respect for others, politeness and even dressing up for our own self-respect, or eating with proper manners.
I find the non-existence of table manners one of the many prevalent faux pas in today’s society. Let’s start by learning table manners.

Using the proper eating utensils will not only show we are knowledgeable in food and we know the sequence or function of each utensils. It also will automatically bring a certain elegant behavior. Our gestures and posture will take a special attitude. Click on my link below to see many eating utensils for proper eating. Some of them have been forgotten, but not in my house. I own them all and I use all of them, impressing my guests every time.

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Being an interior designer does not mean my work stops in building comfortable homes and creating attractive home décor. My work continues in styling other aspects of life. As one of my associates says:
“Valentina will style your home first and then your palate”.
I shall be ready and prompt when you need help in styling your life. Ciao,
Valentina
www.Valentinadesigns.com

 

Copyright © 2012 Valentina Cirasola, All Rights Reserved

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Valentina Cirasola transforms and creates spaces realizing people’s dreams in homes, offices, interiors and exteriors. She infuses your everyday living with a certain luxury without taking away a comfortable living. 
As an interior designer with a passion for kitchens and cooking she loves to remodel homes and loves to turn unattractive spaces into castles, but especially loves to design kitchens and wine grottos.
©RED-A Voyage Into Colors, her new book on the subject of colors is due to be released very soon. Check out her books  on 

Amazon: http://goo.gl/xUZfk0
Barnes&Nobles: http://goo.gl/q7dQ3w

4 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Marianne
    Jun 17, 2012 @ 09:59:15

    Valentina, thank you for sharing your thoughts of design, and life with the rest of the world. I have nominated your for the The Beautiful Blogger Award,

    http://marianne365days.wordpress.com/2012/06/16/self-awareness/#comment-1020. Have a nice day!

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    Reply

    • Valentina
      Jun 19, 2012 @ 14:19:26

      Hi Marianne,
      I am still trying to catch up with everything in my life and work after I spent a month in Italy for the loss of my brother. You probably know I am Italian living in California, but my family leaves there.
      Thank you so much for the award, I accept it very humbly and I am honored of your friendship. I am really happy to read your 365 days blog. It’s a daily inspiration. Ciao,
      Valentina

      Like

      Reply

  2. TBM
    Jun 14, 2012 @ 08:51:32

    I don’t think I’ve ever seen grape scissors. My mom made sure that all of us knew all the proper utensils. I don’t go to expensive restaurants much, but when I do, it is nice to know what I’m doing. And that reminds me, I need new grapefruit spoons. I don’t know what happened to them in the move.

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    • Valentina
      Jun 14, 2012 @ 15:11:42

      I am trying to bring back gentility and good manners by educating and informing. Younger generations got accustomed to vulgarities, profanities and bad manners.
      Society doesn’t have to assist to that helplessly. Thank you for stopping by.
      Valentina

      Like

      Reply

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